Words That Changed Everything:
a book junkie’s tale

The original cover for the book Illusions — My first tantalizing taste of non-religious philosophy.

Illusions: The Adventures of a Reluctant Messiah, by Richard Bach

I was given a copy of Illusions by my therapist when I was 14, struggling with depression in a very closed minded cummunity/culture. It was volcanic. I’m not sure if that was the therapist’s intent. Suddenly there were words for the restlessness inside of me that screamed that there was so much more to know, be, do, have, than what the culture permitted. I had a theme, a creed, for my rebellion.

I would never entirely fit back into the box.

Eventually, I outgrew the box altogether, and I still check back in with Richard and Donald every couple of years to see what is new in the Messiah’s Handbook as I evolve.

Oddly enough, its predecessor, Jonathan Livingston Seagull, with accompanying Neil Diamond soundtrack, was one of my mother’s favorites.

Jonathan Livingston Seagull: A Story, by Richard Bach

As a 6th grader I experienced a large dose of uncharacteristically bold behavior and entered our school talent show. Performing a baton routine to the music of The Flight of the Gull with one of the popular girls at school, I thought this was incredibly powerful music with an intense rhythm. It was a disaster. I survived. It would be several years later that I actually read the book.

The Neil Diamond album for the book-made-movie lived in my mom’s heart (along with an extensive collection of John Denver music) and in our home.

This is odd in some ways, because it signalled a departure in her from the devout religious culture she so throroughly embraced. This tiny crack in the wall allowed enough fresh air to blow, unrecognized, into my life, eventually shattering my walls some decades later.